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Is Your Baggage Holding You Back?

Posted on December 14, 2021 by Michael Crawford

Here you are single again and ready to re-enter the big scary world of dating, and like most everyone, you bring along "baggage". All of us have itsome over others, however, now's the time to analyze the necessity of that baggage in your new life. Nobody is exempt. You may have childhood angst over paternal divorce, conflicts with friends and family, or remorse over missteps and lost opportunities. Everyone has a history and an emotional response to it. What matters, when it comes to being a healthy, thriving human being, is whether or not you have deliberately unpacked your baggage.

As you delve into the new world, consider your life and the events that put you back into the dating world. Perhaps it was divorce, a death or the end of a connection, all very traumatic events in our lives, but if you're ready to proceed with your life, you have to put aside the unnecessary"bags". Handle your grief from whatever situation and prepare your mind and heart to accept joy and love again.

Remember that although someone might say to you"tell me what happened", guess what? They actually don't need to know your life history, easy and to the point is sufficient information.

People are usually nice no matter what you say and yes, it may keep the conversation flowing, but bear in mind the more you say about the"bags", you're not generating any sympathy, but only bringing feelings back to the surface. If the wounds haven't completely healed, take action to resolve the problems that cripple you emotionally and move to a happy and emotionally well-balanced life.

This can be approached in a variety of degrees. While most of us have our own means of managing our emotional baggage, sometimes it's more than you can bear by themselves. Seek out the counselor of your loved ones, clergy or a counselor that will assist you face and deal with the problems which are holding you back. By all means to don't sink to seclusion, come from this darkness, join a gym, have a yoga class and never forget the power of prayer. Expose the issues; occasionally so as to get beyond your past, you occasionally have to enter your past, what went wrong, why did it occur, explore what you're feeling, is it anger, bitterness or just simply a broken heart?

We don't need to hear about your ex, how badly they treated you, ran up your telephone bill, and cleared out your bank accounts or the things which were wrong together. Know what this tells someone? You aren't over it, you're still angry and hurt and certainly"not emotionally available". You want to confront these problems head on and let go of these before considering new starts. Deal with your emotions, feelings, and move ahead thus unpacking the extra baggage.

Realize and accept your situation and its own circumstances, when it's over, take some opportunity to grieve and deal with your feelings and then put them apart, clear your mind and your heart of obstacles and embark on your new journey with a fresh slate.

In discussions with someone new, tell them about yourself, what you want to do, what are your passions, your aims in life, your job, your kids, your pets or anything that's a positive, and forget about the negative. Allow me to tell you this, you let that negativity creep back in and you're going to be sitting home alone watching sappy movies and crying over lost love when you could be enjoying the world that's there to be explored.

So, unpack your luggage and place the unnecessary things away! Store the bags, be it emotional, physical or person, you do not have any need for this. Seek the new horizon before you, the joy that awaits you and the pride of knowing that what you need to offer another man is the greatest of all gifts, but let this present be of you, your present and your future, yesteryear, time to start anew.